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I had this with one of the lorikeets and my oldest son. I didn't bother fighting it as they were both happier together. However my son was 11 at the time. Both the lorikeets are now his and there's a fantastic relationship between my son and his birds. This is to the point that Olly has gotten out of the aviary a couple of times (pure fluke incidents) and Jordan has been able to call her straight back.
If the cockatiel isn't hurting your daughter and she's fine with him then you may need to go with the flow. You still need to be in charge of supervising the pair of them though.
As far as young kids with birds my now 7yo has been playing with the babies since he was about 4-5yo. He knows that he needs to sit down on the floor with him.
Personally I think a cockatiel is a great bird for a youngster. They're a bit more robust then some of the smaller guys but have such a beautiful sensitive nature too.
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