I'm one of those people who don't believe it is important to establish "dominance" with birds. Sometimes they'll test you to see what they can get away with, but they aren't like dogs or wolves in that they jockey for alpha status.
I'm a huge fan of clicker training and the philosophy espoused by Melinda Johnson who admins the
Yahoo Bird Click group. She advocates teaching "stupid parlor tricks" as a way to improve communication and therefore the relationship with your feathered friend. It's not about forcing the bird to do what you want, it's about teaching your bird to want the same thing you want and then doing it voluntarily.
When I got Stewie last July (from an animal shelter where they had no idea what to do with birds), he was one cranky little guy. He was like Jack in that he wanted people around, and paying attention to him, just as long as they didn't come too close. I started clicker training and it totally changed our relationship.
He learned that there are ways to communicate with me that don't involve biting (in fact, he's pretty much stopped nipping altogether). I figured out how to read his body language to understand what he was trying to tell me. He learned that he can manipulate me into giving him treats just by doing some silly tricks. I have a bird who does silly tricks for me. We both have so much more fun together, and he's become downright affectionate -- something I never expected!
Neither of us thinks "we're in charge" - we have a good partnership, where I respect his needs/wants (respect doesn't always mean he always gets what he wants though) and he does what I want him to (
because there's something in it for him).
p.s. Jack should not be out of his cage when you aren't home.
p.p.s. [ self promotion alert] I blog about my adventures with Stewie, including training challenges, here:
Best in Flock - Blog About My Conure Parrot [ / self promotion]
