Gaining Trust

[brightwing]

My grey has been throught 3 other families before me and I think he may have been abuse or not properly taken care of nd the past. He also won't let me touch me and often bites for no reason.
I was wondering how I can gain his trust and stop the biting.

[Emmilyy]

How long have you had him? If you've just gotten him, i'd say give him more time to adjust to his new home and that he may still be scared of his new souroundings. I have no personal experience with greys, but I've heard they take alot longer to adjust to new situations and are very cautious..

[Jag]

Hi!
I just got a CAG on Tuesday, she's 6 years old (I was told, although no band) I am also her 3rd home after spending 6 years in a rabbit cage with no toys etc. def. neglected, possibly abused. Another person had her for a few months, and was going to breed her, luckily it didn't last long... so now here she is!

She let me give her scritches for several seconds tonight... the most she has so far! She hasn't bitten me (yet) but has struck at me a couple times. She did bite my daughter because she refused to listen and wouldn't back off, but she didn't break skin. We're still in the very beginning of this... so I don't know how she's really going to be. I haven't had anything but conures to date... have you had a grey before? Have you had any birds before?

One thing I did pick up before I got her... look at her eyes and watch for pinning. If he's pinning his eyes, I'd leave him alone. Ziva was pinning at me a lot the first few days... but as of late it's rare. I'd love to know how long you've had him, and what you've been doing with him since. In July, I took in 2 conure boys who acted very wild and aggressive. They were bonded, had to be seperated, and finally both are able to be touched. They are even kinda lovey now! However, in the beginning, I was screamed at if I was in sight, they wanted me to go away and leave them alone! They couldn't be touched at all.

I spent a few weeks just talking softly to them, sticking treats in their bowl. I increased the amount of time I spent with them as the screaming got a little better. Then I went to handing them treats. Once they'd take a treat from my hand, I went to try to get them to eat out of my hand. It took a few weeks, but it finally happened. I got bit twice bad... both by the same one. I'm trying very hard to not get bit by Ziva. If you're getting bit a lot, then you're probably putting your hands near him when he doesn't want you to. Although... I don't know if it's the same concept with greys as conures. I'm assuming that it is, and if she gives any indication that she wants me to back off, I do. In fact, tonight is the first time I've touched her outside of her cage at all!

There are people here who have a TON of grey experience, and they are the ones I count on lately when I'm having questions or an issue. Just hang on, I think you'll get some responses, but there will be some questions, too. Without knowing what is going on before you're getting bitten, and how long you've had him, etc. it will be harder to give exact advice. Stick around, I'd like to see how things go for you!

[LovelySydney]

Time and patience are the two main points here. If he has come from a rough home it is going to take time for him to realize that you are not going to hurt him or neglect him. Its also going to take patience from you because who knows how long it could take him to adjust. With time, all things are possible - I know he will come around for you.

[Monica]

Originally Posted by brightwing

My grey has been throught 3 other families before me and I think he may have been abuse or not properly taken care of nd the past. He also won't let me touch me and often bites for no reason.
I was wondering how I can gain his trust and stop the biting.

Lets see... your grey has been in at least four homes now, maybe 4 or 5, if we include a breeder and possibly a store. Without knowing the history of this bird, we don't know how well the bird was taken care of - however this can become null if the bird is not used to new surroundings and strangers.

You mention that the bird wont let you touch him yet he bites "for no reason." Why is he biting you then? Are you trying to force him to do something he's not interested in doing because he doesn't rtust you? Or is he going out of his way to literally come after you and bite you?

Most birds are not like dogs. They don't warm up to people instantly like dogs do (usually dogs who have been well socialized, that is). Take a moment to set yourself in the birds place, then think about all he *may* have gone through and where he's at now. It takes patience, and being able to have the bird associate good things with you. This can be talking, singing, getting treats, being read to, etc.

[jenseits]

Originally Posted by brightwing

My grey has been throught 3 other families before me and I think he may have been abuse or not properly taken care of nd the past. He also won't let me touch me and often bites for no reason.
I was wondering how I can gain his trust and stop the biting.

Couple of points to add to what others have said:

- Just because a bird bites doesn't mean he was abused previously. Birds can take a long time to trust, and biting is often the most effective way for them to communicate with new people. He probably gives you plenty of signs that he doesn't like something, but if you don't listen to those signs he's forced to resort to biting. But if he was abused in the past, you have a even longer road to gaining his trust.

- Birds rarely bite for "no reason"... there's always a reason. The sooner you start to figure out what your Grey's reasons are, the sooner you can learn how to avoid getting bitten. (His reasons can be something as straightforward as "I don't like it when you come near me" or as puzzling as "I don't like the color red"... it doesn't matter if those reasons make sense to you, it's how he feels and you need to respect that.

- You asked how you can "gain his trust and stop the biting"... you stop the biting by gaining his trust. And showing him that you'll listen to his body language and stop forcing him to bite.

As Monica said, birds are not like dogs. Building trust (the burden of the effort is on you, in this case) can take months, so don't think this is something that can be "fixed" in a matter of days. So get ready to be patient, show unconditional love and understanding, and learn about how you can use training to build trust, learn his body language, and figure out a new way to communicate.

Good luck.

[tkirsch9368]

I have the same problem, if that is what you want to call it. I got my CAG 6 wks ago from a very nice lady who did not abuse this bird at all. Here is his story......He was bought as a baby by Paula who had him for 6 yrs, then Paula passed and he went to her son who had him for a few yrs then went 5 or 6 other family members before he ended with Elaine. She had him for 2.5 yrs before he came to me so he was in a stable home for sometime before me. Anyway - when he got to Elaines he started to pluck, no doubt all the moves he had made, and has plucked for her the whole time. She had him in a sufficient size cage but to me was too small for a grey. Perfect for a conure, not a grey. Anyway - he was in a room about 3X5 with 2 other birds. The unfortunate part was these birds were all left alone for about 10 hrs a day. So while I think that they werent physically abused but maybe mentally but by no means did she do this "on purpose" so she heard I was looking for a grey and a friend of a friend etc.....contacted me and that is how I got "buddy" So 5 wks later she called and wanted to know if I wanted her Amazon.....dumb ?.....so off to PA we went so now I have a Sun, Grey and a Zon.....2 pekes, 3 kids and 1 very understanding hubby, love them all! Anyway - here is my story on both the birds I took in.....the Grey came first and he took to the atmosphere pefectly. He was fine as long as he was in his cage. It only took him 2 days to come out. Long story short with him he is a biter too. While he hasnt bitten us he def will given the chance. For the passed 3 days he has been flying down to the floor and will let us pick him up and play with us but will try to bite. He goes to my shoulder and bites my ear. We tell him no very softley and he will back off but them goes right back at it. We def can not get him to step up off his cage only if he flys to us. We can hand feed him very easily cause he will eat anything.

Now the OWA....very laid back. He dont talk at all! He makes the sound of a Raptor, yes the dinosaur. He walks around his cage, dont fly off def wont let us touch him but only had him for a week now......whew, long story!

[brightwing]

Well i had the bird for about two years, but he hasn't change. in the past he would bite me when i tried to feed him but he stopped but mostly he bites when I am holding him, when he does, it is at random times so I can never figure out why, such as yesterday, he stepped up on my hand volunteerly and then for no reason he bit me and when he bites, he always breaks skin and draws blood, so I get nervouse when I hold him, but still do, but cautionally.
I had 3 cockatiels before him and I recently got a free cockatoo from my teacher.

I don't know how he was treated in the past but I am his third family. I got him at a petshop and the owner told us that the reason they got rid of him was because they didn't want him getting fleas, show that shows how much the family knew about birds; and I don't know the story behind his first family.

He rarly lets me pet him, I can pet him when he is on my hand but he doesn't seem to relax about it.
He will sing, talk, and take treats from my hand.

I'm also not the only one the bird bit, there are numbers of people that he has bittten before

[Monica]

Birds can be taught to bite. Being overly nervous can "set" the bird off. Removing yourself from the bird can also teach biting.

While sitting on your hand, was there any disturbances elsewhere in the room? Another person walking around? Another pet? Perhaps something going on outside?


Have you looked into clicker training?

[sodakat]

In some ways, I think you are being too hard on both yourself and the bird. You obviously have made progress over the two years you've had him, so good job on that!

Sometimes we have expectations that are more than the bird can deliver. He will take treats from your hand and will step up, so he does trust you. He doesn't trust that you won't try to pet him though, because you said when you do, he bites. So, teach him he can trust that you won't try to pet him.

Now that you have a cockatoo, you have a bird that probably does want to be petted, so maybe you can get your bird-cuddling-needs met by that bird.

When he bites you out of the blue, however, you need to pay attention to what else is going on around you. Is he trying to keep you from paying attention to someone or something else? Or, does he think you are walking towards his cage to put him away? There has to be something that is contributing to the bite.