Advice is needed for my Timneh

[Buzzy]

I did post this to special help, but this may be better directed to the viewing publice. Everybody has advice, especially bird lovers. Well I need some.
We purchased a beautiful Timneh from a family with 7 kids. We knew problems would be there but we accepted them. Diego, our Timneh, has come along wonderfully in the last 3 months living with us. All is normal with one exception. He is afraid of my hands. He will step up from his cage, and will go to my arm, but to try to touch him, your in for a fight, and missing hyde. I was thinking of toweling him & taking him in the bathroom (quiet, no distractions) and caress him, spend time talking to him and generally assure him I'm not going to hurt him by touching him. Latter, towel games will come if he's acclimated to this treatment.
Does anyone agree, or have a different or better way of dealing with this behavior?
Buzzy's got the blues.

[dislater]

Why do you NEED to touch Diego?
I have two African Greys. One occasionally loves to be petted and hugged and the other loves to sit on my hand and arm but does not want to be petted or hugged. Petting is really not a regular part of birdy-behavior and I never try to force petting on my birds. I have two dogs that I use if I feel I need to 'pet' something.

I think if I were you I would accept Diego for all his wonderful qualities and don't push the touching, petting thing at all. Let him be a bird and enjoy him for all his birdy-ness and the uniqueness of being a bird. di

[MiniMama]

Depending on how much effort you want to put into this, I recommend what I am doing now:
Go to behaviorworks.org and look for the listserv sign up. This site is run by Susan Friedman, a psychologist who writes a lot of quality articles on positive reinforcement. She offers a class, and I am signed up for the January session. But in the meantime, I signed up for the listserv to see what the current students are working through. One of the students is working through a problem with fear of hands. She describes the problem, gets feedback from the instructors, implements the feedback and reports on it. The whole process teaches how to understand the bird's behavior and motivation and what the owner can do to change it. It also points to alot of articles that are worth reading. Anyhow, like I said, this takes a bit of effort, so see if it will work for you. I also recommend the book 'Don't shoot the dog'. The course recommends it, and I have already read it, and can vouch for its invaluableness. Take care, Kari

[Buzzy]

In reply to Dislater:You have a good point, and all are considered to give their personal thoughts on various issues. My wife & I have various reasons to want to touch or delicately handle Diego. One is we would love to take him places in a flight suit as we do with Skylar, our B&G Macaw. Skylar looks forward to it. We respect Diego’s wishes and my wife is getting better in petting or rubbing Diego. I guess time and dedication will eventually give way to trusting us more. We have no idea what the previous family of 7 kids did to his trust of humans. Thanks for the insight.

[mizbirdy]

Hey Buzzy! I'm kinda surprised Lisa B hasn't gotten in here but she may not have seen this thread yet. I agree w/dislater, don't push the petting issue; I don't own a grey but have read several articles on them & that species isn't the cuddley type like cockatoos (altho there are exceptions to this rule, especially hand-reared babies). But I can understand wanting to be able to put the flight suit on him, plus in case an emergency would happen. Just give it time & work with him!

[brds4mepdx]

Hiya Buzzy,
I have several kinds of birds in my flock and one is a TAG that recently added. He is quite different from my U2, who loves to be hugged and snuggled. Chief does not like to be snuggled and hugged but I am making progress with scratching his head and occasionally he lets me scratch under his beak. Trust is the biggest thing I see with many types of birds and being able to do different things with them such as petting, scratching, or as my Severe Macaw likes to lay in my hand upside down with his wings and tail flared and wrestle with me.
Sometimes trust comes quickly like my Severe or like my TAG the trust is slower in coming, however it will come as long as I am patient and willing to work at Chief's pace. I hope this helps. Tish

[The Outlaw]

If all else fails, try the intensive love method. Very similar to your towel scenario, you simply wrap the bird in a towel, go to a quiet room and hold them close to your body. They will struggle at first, but in the end, they relax and let go. I have had to use this 3 times: for my Severe, and two rescue Amazons. It worked very well each time.

Greys are a bit neurotic on a good day and in the company of 7 kids, I can well imagine what a day in that home had to be like. Its too much stimuli for reserved birds.

For more detailed information on the intensive love method, please go to www.landofvos.com. Its Carolyn Swicegood's site and an excellent source for all kinds of parrot information, though its geared to ekkies. Frankly, having both greys and ekkies, I often think that the greys are the least user friendly of most larger parrots.

On one point I do agree with Di: grey parrots are NOTHING like macaws or toos. They really don't enjoy being petted much. Both of my greys love to have their heads skritched on their terms, but neither relishes being stroked under the wings or on their chest.

[greyburd]

My Timneh doesn't really like his head scritched. He will put his head down when I'm going to take him out of his cage. But, that's about the only time he will allow me to really give him head scritches. When he's out of his cage or with me anywhere, it just doesn't happen. On a very rare occasion, he will allow me to rub under his wings.

My Congo on the other hand could not have enough head scritches. The other night, she sat on my chest and let me rub all around her head (for almost an hour). She doesn't like touching anywhere else on her body.

[Buzzy]

Thank you all for the advice and adventures you've had. Been reading specific articals & books for TAGs and find out each bird is as individual as we are. Keep us in mind and I'll repost after a month or so on the progress. For now, I'll keep on reading & dancing with Diago. He does give kisses as long as my arms are at my side. Thanks again.
Buzz