You might be bird obsessed if...

[Missi]

My friend posted this as a Myspace bulletin and I jsut HAD to cross post it



...You can hardly type because your bird is dancing on the keyboard while chewing on your pen!

You spend more time cleaning your bird cages than your house!

You hear an "echo" each time you push a microwave button!

You try to teach your dog to say "Hello!"

Your hungry family asks what's for dinner and you say you just whipped up a fresh pot of "Crazy Corn!"

You're going across town and you realize half-way there that your bird is still sitting on your shoulder!

You kiss the birds good-night but not your spouse!

You go on the vacation of a lifetime and can only tell your friends what cool bird stuff you found!

You don't care if people see bird poop stains on your shirt!

Your darling birdie sneezes and you drive 2 hours to the avian vet!

Every shirt you own has buttons missing!

You say "Hello....Hello....Hello!" to your people friends.

You pull up in the driveway, and you see that your bird is looking out the window. You start waving saying, "Hi Kiwi. Its mommy! I'm home from work now."

Your friends dog is pregnant, and you ask if the puppies have hatched yet.

Later you accidentally refer to his dog as a "hen."

You're leaving a gathering of friends, and you find yourself saying, "Bye bye! Gimmee SMOOCHIES!"

At last count you had over 200 bird toys and only 2 birds.

You make sure your pizza isn't too hot so the birdies wont burn their feet.

You're on a first-name basis with the seed moths that hang around your house.

You refer to the hair loss from your dog as "molting."

You tell your boyfriend not to touch you in front of the bird because the bird might get jealous.

You drop your purse in the supermarket and sunflower seeds fall out.

You fight over who gets custody of the birds when the romance ends.



I do many of these

[RingneckedPrincess]

Ah that's about right

Dani

[raddaughter]

That is too funny! Here is something else:

When you are tense, let me teach you to relax.
When you are short tempered, let me teach you to be patient.
When you are short sighted, let me teach you to see.
When you are quick to react, let me teach you to be thoughtful.
When you are angry, let me teach you to be serene.
When you feel superior, let me teach you to be respectful.
When you are self absorbed, let me teach you to think of greater things.
When you are arrogant, let me teach you humility.
When you are lonely, let me be your companion.
When you are tired, let me carry the load.
When you need to learn, let me teach you.
After all, I am your bird.

And now, the REAL story.....

When you are tense, let me teach you that there are lions outside of the window and I MUST let you know!
When you are short tempered, let me teach you that there is a place on the top of my cage you can't reach- and I won't let you get me, even when in a hurry.
When you are short sighted, let me teach you to figure out where, in your back yard forest I am hiding.
When you are quick to react, let me teach you that my beak is stronger than you think.
When you are angry, let me teach you that I really don't want to step up, stop screaming, and cooperate, even if you have a headache.
When you are worried, let me entertain you with my mystery illness just so I can get a new toy and treats.
When you feel superior, let me teach you that, mostly, you are the maid service.
When you are self absorbed, let me teach you to PAY ATTENTION. Remember? I told you about those lions (kitty cats) in them the woods?
When you are arrogant, let me teach you what one good bite can do.
When you are lonely, let me be your companion. Let's do lunch. Also, breakfast and dinner.
When you are tired, don't forget the 100lb cage that needs to be cleaned.
When you are feeling financially secure, let me teach you the meaning of "Veterinary Services".
When you need to learn, hang around, bud. I'll learn ya.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Avian High School Cliques
Amazons- jocks. Love to play hard. Strong, tough, and are still great looking ;)
Eclectus- Hot chicks who KNOW they are better that everyone else. Independent, beautiful, and smart, but boy can they eat!
African Greys- geekish, but cool, very popular. Smartest of all parrots and aren't afraid to show off their 2000 word vocabulary.
Cockatoos- Vocalists. Have a beautiful voices and have beautiful 'hair' (crests)
Macaws- rich kids. Live in the huge mansions, have the most expensive toys and contienue to ask for more. Everyone wants to be with them, but they aren't afraid to voice their opinions over things.
Budgies- average, but once you get to know them, they make best friends for life!
Cockatiels- Great singers too. They ove to be with the group and be the center of attention.
Lovebirds- compeditive, love to play hard and be paired up to show off.
Parrotlets- 'dwarfs'. Teacher's pets, loved by everyone. However, despite their small size, they have huge personalities.
Conures- peace loving creatures. They have their own clique who is considered VIP (very imporatant parrots). They are full of energy and often have trouble sitting still!
Pionus- full of personality, but are slightly aloof. You have to know them to love them, but once you do, you will learn about their wit and charm.
Caiques- class clowns. They aren't afraid to goof and be funny!
------------------------------------------------------------------------
You use your bird's feathers as a home accessory.
Your entertainment for the week is training you agressive bird and bandaging your fingers.
You fight for what newspaper you are going to get.
You give your bird more baths than you do yourself.
Your bird has more perches than you do furniture.
You clip your birds wings more than you shave your legs.
You spent more money on your bird's fresh fruits and veggies that you do youself.
You didn't have air conditioning, but your bird has a climate controlled room.
You would rather go to bird shows that church.
Your bird has more grooming supplies than you do cosmetics.
You wear the same dirty, bird poo covered clothes to avoid dirtying more.

Hehe, hope you like these! I found them forever ago and had them saved- I knew they would be good for something besides my personal enjoyment!

[jimpierce7]

lmao!!! Thats great stuff!!!

[Doyle'sMommy]

I love them!! So true!

[kimtoo]

hmmmm....I don't know anyone that fits that description! roflmao

[catschair]

I know some people like that, but won't name names (how could anyone have just two birds and 200 toys.... now 20 birds and 200 toys......)

[raddaughter]

By the time I get home form the bird fair, with toy making kits and pre made toys, Harley will have 200 toys, and she is only one bird!

[Missi]

Originally Posted by catschair

I know some people like that, but won't name names (how could anyone have just two birds and 200 toys.... now 20 birds and 200 toys......)

*raises hand* Actually one fid and 200 toys

[kathyellen]

It's all so true, what an amazing special thing it is to be 'owned' by birds...and dogs, and guinea pigs..lol