How do you know if you should rehome?

[Vega]

I'm hoping to get some guidence here as I'm really struggling with this issue. 2 months ago I brought home a patagonian conure. I expected there to be an adjustment period, but things aren't seeming to get any better. He constantly nips (and bites) at me. I go through the routine of telling him "no bite" and try giving him a toy instead. He spits it out and continues what he was doing. I've tried ignoring him and he'll keep nipping until he finally bites to get a reaction. I've tried ignoring the bites and he only bites harder. I've told him 'no' then put him back in his cage...when he comes back out it's like revenge time. Any time I touch him he freaks out as if I'm hurting him (I'm very gentle) sometimes I don't even have to touch him and he'll freak out. Normally that's when he knows I'm going to stop him from doing something.

Also he has to be on me at ALL times. (is that normal?) I knew they liked to cuddle and get attention, but he won't even step off of me to play or eat! If I want him to eat I have to hold him and the bowl. I've tried putting them down and he immediately climbs back onto me. I can't take him from my room as he seems to be afraid of our dogs, and that limits the amount of "out time" he gets. I kinda feel like I'm neglecting him.

He's my first conure, second bird (the other is a Vos Eclectus). I expected things would take some time, but it seems as if it's only getting worse. I'm seriously considering finding him a new home. I've never done something like that before though. I just feel as if I'm not able to give him the amount of attention/time he requires. With my Vos, she'll go off and play while I'm doing other things. She'll come over to me from time-to-time to get a little lovin, and then go back on her merry way. I can keep her out much more than I'm able to have the conure out and that bothers me. I wanted to give him a forever home, but I also want to do what's best for him and his well-being. I don't know if maybe I'm jumping the gun a bit here, or if a few more months will change things.

So how does one make such a decision? Is there any thing I can do to start to resolve some of the issues? How much time does he really need out of his cage? (at this point he's only getting about an hour where the Vos gets 2-3) I have 3 dogs and a fish tank to care for on top of the birds. I can't hold my conure while taking care of the others, for his own safety. That's another reason he's stuck in his cage so much. I simply do not know what to do here.

[iggysbirds]

If you really care about this bird I would suggest keeping trying even though it can get annoying at times. Do you have a local bird club/society, a rescue or an individual quite knowlegable in birds that might actually come over to see you and your bird in person? A lot of times someone who is actually "there" can better assess the situation and make better suggestions on how to cope.

As far as the constantly wanting on you, do you stand by the cage and he climbs up, does he have full wings so he flies to you, or does he scream until you take him? Biting does he do it at certain times or all the time, does he give you a warning?

I am sure the wonderful people on this board could help you but the questions above is why it is sometimes better to get someone to actually come to your home to see any signs you might be missing or give tips you might not have yet thought of.

Good Luck!
Stephanie

[danforth3]

The only comfort I can offer is that it takes lots of time, love and patience when you rehome a bird. Unfortunately most birds who are rescued suffer from severe trauma and need lots of love and patience. It is a very slow process and can take years to successfully gain trust and love from a bird you have adopted.

Like humans, birds that are adopted come into our lives with a lot of baggage. I know that there are several members of this site who rehome birds and I am sure that one of them will provide you with some tips. I can tell you that you need to slowly start training the bird in the basics (1) step up onto hand, ladder or dowel, (2) step up from cage and (3) step up from inside cage. This will help to start creating a bond between you and your companion. You need to keep the environment for the bird calm, talk to it, feed it, love it and not flinch or yell out whenever it bites. It is resorting to behaviors which it feels keeps it safe.

There are several good books on bird training plus a couple that deal specifically with rehoming a bird and successfully bonding with it. They are available at http://avianpublications.com. There are also several good books regarding conures, their behaviors, teaching and training them available. The one I found most useful was The Conure Handbook -- also available at the avian publications website.

You've only had your conure 2 months and that is not a very long time--it is going to take a long time before any progress is seen, but you are probably making small strides without even knowing it.

Conures are contact birds (my experience with them is limited) but any conure I have been with has been like that. They want to sit on you at all times. They are very interactive with humans. However, you can teach him that he can be with you without being on your shoulder--I do not think I would allow that until the biting and nipping has been controlled.

Again my experience with Conures is limited, but in my limited experience they do not always like to have other birds or animals around them or share their favorite human with them. You can work with them on this to accept other animals who are with their humans, but any conure I've been around has been very hands-on so to speak with their humans. They want to sit in a position of dominance (on the shoulder) with their humans as if to say, I am in control, not my human.

There will be a lot of work necessary for you and your conure for success. Hopefully you will accept the challenge because in the end you discover a wonderful companion.

Best wishes. Before your rehome him, I would suggest at least getting a some books on conures and on rehoming birds. They will provide you with the information you need for success.

[smallonion]

I would suggest you post this in the "ask the experts' section. I think particularly that Kim Bear might be able to help you, even though she's the cockatoo expert, she's given me good advice on Humphrey. Also, you might write to Wayne at Wayne's parrot stuff, who in my opinion, is the best in understanding parrots. His advice has changed Humphrey's life. Either google him or I wil PM you the email address. He does phone consultations but an introductory email might help him to know if he can help you. He is super friendly and knowledgeable.

Moreover, imho,maybe you shouldn't re-home him just yet. This is how so many parrots end up in the cycle of bad homes and abuse, and then (hopefully) rescues. Just because they are not the pet that their owner wants them to be.
At least *you* CARE about him. Someone else down the road might not, and he could end up stuck in a dark basement because he yells and bites. I've read too many terrible stories like that. You might find him a good home, but who knows if they will keep him, and where he will end up.

Your conure is a feeling, complicated creature and deserves a bit more work and research. You made a committment to him when you brought him home, so I hope you will try a little harder and seek out some solutions. Then, when you've exhausted every possible solution and behaviour modification, you can consider re-homing him. I understand he might be driving you crazy, and how hard it must be.

I hope you are not offended by my post but I care very much about parrots and oppose the casual sale of them. Please seek out help from experts and work on teaching your bird. His life depends on it.
With best wishes
Michele and Humphrey

[Skyebirdsmom]

Can't you lock up your dogs in a room for an hour or so every day so the bird can have more out time? Only an hour a day is not enough for any bird.
Linda & HRC~

[kensbuns]

It has taken my Allegra a year to come around to the great bird he is. All rescues and "Free Birds" mostly come with baggage. But this is your life and only you can make that decision. If you find yourself regretting the decision and you take it out on the bird and you feel you neglect him then I say re-home. But if you love this little guy and want to do what is best for him I say give it some more time.

[SavvyMoon]

Vega,

I'm going to try and keep my reply as short as possible, because I've said it all before, and I am also going through a similar problem with a bird I've been caring for, for more than a year now. (My bird was not a rescue, I am his 1st home after the pet shop).
I am not saying this as a direct contradiction to what others have said so far... they all have valid and logical suggestions... BUT...

Do not totally dismiss the option of re-homing your bird into a BETTER situation because of guilt.
Your own guilt or anyone else's.

You need to do what's best for the bird. The bird is number one priority
here.... I think we can all agree on that, right?

If you can make a real effort to find the Optimal Home for your conure,
somewhere where he will be cared for, loved, and treated with the utmost
patience that he deserves, why deny him that opportunity?

He deserves the chance at a happy home, with an owner who
will be a better match for him.
There is no shame in a situation where you have tried
your best, but it turns out that the home environment/bird,
or owner/bird connection just isn't a good match.
This is something that no one can ever be absolutely 100% sure of
before the fact. We all have the best intentions when we take in a bird...

You try your best, you give it as much time as you feel is possible,
but when all is said and done, every bird deserves the best possible home and owner.
Especially those 'special needs' birds that have had a rougher time of it than others.

So I say do not rule out eventually re-homing the bird.
It's a hellova lot better than trying to keep him and fighting the forces
of nature; until you resent and/or fear the bird- and the bird fears and/or resents you
and then you will BOTH be miserable.

[Vega]

Thank you all for the responses, I'm going to read the article posted as soon as I get home. I do love this little guy, but I want what's best for him and right now I'm not 100% sure I'm it. I'm going to pick up some of the books mentioned this weekend and see if I can work on this a little more.

As for locking the dogs up, I've tried that. But all they do is bark and cry and that seems to freak my little guy out even more. When I get him out I try getting him to stay on his little play area, but he stops at NOTHING to get to wherever I am. He is not a rescue bird, rather one that was rehomed from his previous owner. THey were moving and had to cut back on their flock. Since he was the newest member and the friendliest with strangers...

I'll answer the rest of the questions this evening, but I'll take any other advice I can get. I want to make sure I've completely thought this through.

[smallonion]

I've thought a lot about this issue all night. I have started to re-consider, but ONLY if you give your conure to someone who you know is 100 percent committed to birds and will keep him. I agree that one hour out of the cage is not enough, but my Humphrey is cage-free so I am on the opposite end of the scale!

Basically, I'm conflicted because the little conure did not ask to be brought into the world as a pet. As such, the human world has a great responsibility to him - to give him the best life possible. But I would do serious research - both on behaviour modification, and if that doesn't work, then serious research on a new home (getting a legitimate parrot rescue to rehome him might be best)
Poor little misunderstood guy! Hope it all works out
Michele and Humph

[kensbuns]

Well Said Savvy Moon. Nothing wrong with your opinion I believe you are absolutely correct.