Preventing an Impulse Buy...advice?

[jdlilfan]

We've got a huge problem with a family member wanting to make an impulse purchase. I don't know what else to tell her. What would you guys do? Here's the situation:

My grandmother is an 83 year old widow. She's always wanted a parrot, but she's under a very false impression of what the reality is. She thinks that it will be just like the dancing and talking parrots you see on television.

She's mentioned wanting a Scarlet Macaw...dear Lord help me. She already has a cockatiel, which is perfect for her. She complains frequently about the mess, but overall, she's very happy with it.

I've told her about the noise (she's very sensitive to noise), mess, hormones, Teflon, diet, expense, etc. I've touched everything.

I've offered to pick her up anytime she wants to come visit my flock, but she is just desperate for her own bird.

My grandmother is a very sweet woman and I love her more than anything in the world. She's got a huge heart and I know she's got good intentions, BUT I'm very concerned if she gets a large bird, not only is it going to develop serious behavioral issues, but I'm also very concerned she's going to get hurt.

What would you guys tell someone like this?

[angelicarboreals]

Hmmmmm.....if you do not have a large bird yourself that is extremely loud, noisy, messy for her to spend the day with, is there someone else that owns the bird she is interested in (in this case a Scarlet Macaw) that she can go spend the day with in order to really see what she is getting into?

I have had friends come to visit that are in love with my birds and want one of their own, but I always tell them to come back on cleaning day and spend all day with them to get a good dose of what the reality of large parrot ownership is like. That, and I show them the food bill, lol. Once they see that I can eat for cheaper than my birds can in a month they usually change their mind.

I would also tactfully bring up the topic of her age versus the lifespan of a macaw. Without getting into a heated discussion with older people that visit this forum and have large parrots, I feel that your grandmother at 83 probably should consider what will happen to the bird if she was to pass away.

Your grandmother is braver than me, lol. I do not think I am equipped nor brave enough to handle a macaw- I do have to give her credit.

[jdlilfan]

I'll have to try bringing her over on a cleaning day. That may work some. I've got a sun, nanday, and a Grey. She's been over here when my sun has started his ear-splitting wake-the-dead calls, and she had to go downstairs (she's very sensitive to noise). I figured that'd talk her out of it, but it didn't.

And I do agree, there's a lot of older folks out there who do an excellent job with their large birds, or any bird they may have. However, she's very set in her ways and refuses to let us help her do any research.

We've inquired about her plans if she falls ill or has to move out of her house, and she doesn't have a plan, other than assuming someone in the family will deal with it. My fiance and I can't take another bird in at the current moment as we're trying to save money, and adding another bird right now would spread ourselves thin and isn't fair to our current flock. Other family members won't take it in since they have small children or travel frequently.

I do know several people with macaws, however, they live far away, or else I'd drive her over to visit them tomorrow lol. I may have them contact her and talk with her though.

Thanks for the advice. :)

[Shutterbugmom]

If she's set on getting another bird, perhaps you could talk her into getting a green cheek conure (she might like the flashiness of the mutations) or a crimson bellied conure. Big personalities in little bodies.

Of course, if you think she can't handle another bird, then it's not fair to the bird.

[jdlilfan]

Haha, we thought about mentioning a GCC to her before she got her cockatiel. I'm concerned it'd end up on a seed-only diet, since that's what happened to the cockatiel. She got aggravated when she saw she could buy seed for $4 instead of spending money on good quality diet. *Sigh.

[sadisticotaku]

Yikes... cockatiel food is fairly cheap too!

You could always.. try stalling. How does she plan on purchasing the macaw? Maybe try playing it off, and say that no one is selling any macaws at the moment. Does she like any other animals? A dog may be better for her.

Sounds like she's not going to change her mind. Best of luck!

[CRToon83]

She doesn't like mess... but she wants a Macaw. Yeah.

My grandfather is about the same age, and he had a yellow headed amazon for 50+ years before it died a couple years ago... but in regards to getting another one he's responsible enough to be worried about where it will go when it dies. Recently I offered to care of it when he can't any longer, so we're looking at an African Grey. Thankfully he will buy quality and fresh food for the bird.

However, if your grandmother is anything like my grandmother (his wife), then she won't be satisfied until she sees it herself. For her, stories, pictures, videos wouldn't work. She has to be first hand to see how bad it could be. What kinds of birds do you have? Maybe take your most obnoxious one over just to show how much work it really is?

I seriously don't want to sound like a jerk, but it honestly sounds like she's being irrational. A year ago I soooo desperately wanted a Macaw. Then I actually did research, and came to terms that I couldn't properly care for one right now. However, my 5 yr old 2nd cousin, who acts like i'm his big brother, is still insistent that I get one.

I like what taku suggested... stall and hope she forgets?

If none of that works, maybe mention the life span and ask what will happen in the long run? Suggest a more compatible bird that you could care for when she no longer can... that's what I did.

Nonetheless, I wish you the best.

[sodakat]

If she insists on buying a $1200 bird, let her find one, drive to pick it up herself, buy the $400 cage herself, transport it home herself, etc. I would doubt she will follow through. Maybe it's just fun for her to imagine owning such a bird. If she actually succeeds in doing this, I hope she rehomes a very elderly bird.

--Kathy

[TonyM]

jdlilfan,
Where are you from? I'm willing to bet that Zuri (my Scarlet) could convince your grandmother that she doesn't really want a macaw.
Tony

[Vega]

Could you appeal to her caring/sensitive side? Explain that at her age (let's be realistic here) how heartbreaking it would be for the bird to have to be rehomed later on. Explain the adjustment period that goes on for a parrot to bond to its owner, and how it effects them to lose the only person they have. It goes beyond which person will take the bird, but the emotional impact it will have on the animal.

It isn't fair to anyone to just "Assume" someone will take on the care of such an animal. For one, not everyone has the time and patience. Two, they are expensive...can she afford the $25-$75 per toy, estimating no less than 8 toys, various perches, food, etc...how does she expect someone else to take on such a financial burden? And three...while many people love looking at birds, very few actually wish to own one. This is a very serious issue that she needs to take into account before making a purchase.