Lonely Cockatoo

[terri.b]

I originally posted this in the regular forum, not the cockatoo experts forum but thought I might get better help here. Here is my other post:

I have a lesser sulphur-crested cockatoo who's first beloved human is my son. My son left for college a little over a week ago and I'm wondering how long it will take her to settle into a new routine and be more content since he's gone. Anytime my son was home she was with him. Her second beloved is my husband and he pays attention to her whenever she needs it. But much of the time now she is discontent and constantly says "Hi Beeker!" (her name) and drives us nuts. She has been able to hear my son's voice every day on the cell phone speaker phone, she used to talk to him on the cell phone as well.

I'm wondering if talking to him every day and hearing his voice but not being able to see him actually makes it harder for her to get over him. We've tried to keep her busy with toys, petting her, just letting her sit by my husband at any time, and she's definitely not over my son yet! Will she ever get over him and get herself into a new routine?

[KimBear]

Most likel she will adjust in time but may never develop the same level of trust and fondness that she has for your son. There's no way to know for sure. You can do your best, and hope she decides it's "good enough". Parrots can definately develop preferences for certain people, but in the absense of that person, they usually will come around to new people. Often it's a matter of time and how much effort a person is willing to put in.

Keep her active physically and mentally, giving her something to focus her energy on so that the stress of missing your son doesn't overwhelm her. Change her toys around more often and give her lots of "hand toys" that you can take in and out often throughout the day. This gives her something new and different to play with all the time.

Trust can be built through treats and handling, but at the same time you don't want to push the bird too much. Take your cues from her and if you sense that she's had enough, give her a little break. It may be more meaningful if you can spend several short sessions with her rather than just one or two longer ones.

As far as not hearing your son's voice for a while, try an experiment. Don't let her hear him for a few days and see if you notice either an increase in her anxiety, or a decrease.

Here's something you might watch out for: When you hear her making her "feel sorry for me" voice, be careful how you respond because you might mistakingly teach her to do that to get your attention. Rather than rushing up to her to comfort her, wait for her to say something else, or wait for her to be quiet before getting her out or paying attention to her.

[terri.b]

Thanks, my husband is also bonded with her and is trying to give her as much attention as she needs. She also has been really enjoying chewing up popsicle sticks. She's still talking to my son each day but does seem to be adapting and less stressed.