I am at a loss with our cockatiel

[bbygrl99]

Wow first of all this site is great! So much info!
I need help and you all seem like a great place to start!
We decided after much research and talking to our local pet store we decided to get a cockatiel. We got Jack. Jack was handfed and just weaned when we brought him home back in Aug/Sept. He was born in June. We got a large cage and numerous toys. Jack has never been warm and friendly but he tolerated us. He took to me more than my husband but I spent the most time with him. Jack likes to be on your shoulder as long as you aren't touching him or bothering him and he wants you in the same room as him but that is about it. Recently he is getting more and more aggressive and just plain mean. Jack has never been "locked" in his cage he has always had free roam on and around his cage.
It has gotten to the point where if you even get close to him he cowers down and hisses or trys to bite you. But if you walk out of the room he screams at the top of his lungs. Its almost like he wants to be around but not near you?
He loves to wistle a few different tunes but I don't understand why he doesn't want contact with us?
Does anyone have any ideas? I am open for anything.. I want a loving bird that wants to be with me!!
Thanks again
M~

[KDK241]

It sounds like hormones to me. Basically he is like a teenager, he's not sure what he wants. My male Zeke is about 4 years old and he has been like that since I got him. He is really only like that when he is sitting on his cage, otherwise he is fine. When he hisses at me when I try to pick him up I don't leave him alone, even when he bites hard I make sure he gets on me. He has bit me hard enough to draw blood quite a few times but now he never bites but he will act like he is going to. He needs to know that he is NOT the boss, regardless of what he thinks. I also don't let him sit on my shoulder all the time. The shoulder is a dominant position for a bird so he gets to sit on my shoulder as a treat when he is being good.

Also, having him with you in other places in the house but not actually on you could help. I also spend time just talking to him with him sitting on my hand. If he tries to go on my shoulder, I put him back on my hand. After a couple times he realized he's not getting on my shoulder and will be happy to sit on my hand. Then I just talk to him. Zeke loves to run around on my bed while watching American Idol with me (he thinks he is going to be the next American Idol) He also loves to go upstairs and sit on the desk and play. I give him paper to chew on (his favorite) and keep some treats with me for when he is being really good. He will very, very rarely let me scratch him and even when he does, he tolerates it but doesn't really enjoy it.

Just be patient and spend some time with him in different ways. Make sure he knows that he is not the one in control and eventually he will come around. Giving a treat when he will come up on your hand without being hissy is very helpful too.

[catschair]

I agree.

It is also coming up onto spring -- and a lot of my birds seem to think it has arrived. My tiels are still being sweet, but the budgies and finches are all pairing up and the ringies would be glad to remove a chunk of my skin on any day right about now.

[bbygrl99]

Thank you I have started this morning just letting him get on my hand and 2 times he didn't bite or hiss. So I talked nice to him and put him back on and did it a few times. He seems to be in a good mood today so i will start using your advice.. it gives me some hope!
Do you reccomend any good treats? He doesn't seem to like the ones I have picked out.
Thanks again!

[tigressmidnight]

he has to much freedom, he feels the whole room is his territory and he must protect it, you should start locking him up when your not home, it is also much safer to do that as well, is he clipped? if not, most birds (but not all) will get more agressive and get the "i dont need you" attitude because they are more "wild" clipped birds depend on you so they are sweeter and more friendly. also, try not leaving him on your shoulder too much, that is a dominant position, he feels in controle. you shouild spend more one on one time with him infront of you petting (if possable) and talking to him, showing him you are not a threat.

[bbygrl99]

wow I thought we were doing the right thing by not caging him. I will def try that. His wings were clipped and they prob need it again about now. THanks for the advice we will try it !!!

[mymacaw]

My Cockatiel will not let you touch him unless you have a sock on your hand,If you try to pick him up bare handed he will bite you but with the sock he will hop right on your hand and start singing away.

[JoT]

I agree too much freedom. He needs to know you are the top bird and are in charge. He is dependent on you for food, freedom etc.. Be careful letting him on your shoulder,especially if he is showing aggression. He could really hurt you and it is a position that puts him in control. You can't see him and when its time to get off he will run to the other side if he doesn't want to get off, again controlling the situation. Make sure his cage and play areas keep him lower than your eye level.

[jenseits]

I'm one of those people who don't believe it is important to establish "dominance" with birds. Sometimes they'll test you to see what they can get away with, but they aren't like dogs or wolves in that they jockey for alpha status.

I'm a huge fan of clicker training and the philosophy espoused by Melinda Johnson who admins the Yahoo Bird Click group. She advocates teaching "stupid parlor tricks" as a way to improve communication and therefore the relationship with your feathered friend. It's not about forcing the bird to do what you want, it's about teaching your bird to want the same thing you want and then doing it voluntarily.

When I got Stewie last July (from an animal shelter where they had no idea what to do with birds), he was one cranky little guy. He was like Jack in that he wanted people around, and paying attention to him, just as long as they didn't come too close. I started clicker training and it totally changed our relationship.

He learned that there are ways to communicate with me that don't involve biting (in fact, he's pretty much stopped nipping altogether). I figured out how to read his body language to understand what he was trying to tell me. He learned that he can manipulate me into giving him treats just by doing some silly tricks. I have a bird who does silly tricks for me. We both have so much more fun together, and he's become downright affectionate -- something I never expected!

Neither of us thinks "we're in charge" - we have a good partnership, where I respect his needs/wants (respect doesn't always mean he always gets what he wants though) and he does what I want him to (because there's something in it for him).

p.s. Jack should not be out of his cage when you aren't home.
p.p.s. [ self promotion alert] I blog about my adventures with Stewie, including training challenges, here: Best in Flock - Blog About My Conure Parrot [ / self promotion]

[JoT]

Maybe I did sound a little controlling... But I think of of it like raising your children. You are the parent and they are the child. You are in charge and it is your job to raise them and teach them what is acceptable behavior and what is not. Just like with your children,they have to realize that you are the parent. Your kids grow up and become independent functioning well in society and your birds grow up and function well in their place in your flock. Its not so much dominating but teaching. Someone is always "in charge" of all of us, we all answer to someone. AND -just like with our children,its all done with love