Definition of a liberal .... pretty funny

[Kevin]

Definition of a liberal

1. You have to be against capital punishment, but support abortion on demand.



2. You have to believe that businesses create oppression and governments create prosperity.



3. You have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding citizens are more of a threat than U.S. nuclear weapons technology in the hands of Chinese and North Korean communists.



4. You have to believe that there was no art before federal funding.



5. You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical changes in the earth's climate and more affected by soccer moms driving SUVs.



6. You have to believe that gender roles are artificial, but being homosexual is natural.



7. You have to believe that the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of federal funding.



8. You have to believe that the same teacher who can't teach 4th-graders how to read is somehow qualified to teach those same kids about sex.



9. You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but PETA activists do.



10. You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than actually doing something to earn it.



11. You have to believe that Mel Gibson spent $25 million of his own money to make "The Passion of the Christ" for financial gain only.



12. You have to believe the NRA is bad because it supports certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good because it supports certain parts of the Constitution.



13. You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too high.



14. You have to believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinem are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, Gen. Robert E. Lee, and Thomas Edison.



15. You have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides are not.



16. You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked anywhere it's been tried is because the right people haven't been in charge.



17. You have to believe that this message is a part of a vast, right-wing conspiracy.





GOD BLESS AMERICA................................. ooops, can't do that
either

[cpryslek]

that hits the spot!

[bustersbuddy]

As a card carrying liberal, I believe almost NONE of those things and believe me, my credentials are exemplary.

[Casa Amazona]

I love it, Keev!

[Lisa B]

[Irish]

#18. You have to believe in the right of even delusional right-wing wingnuts to indulge in Free Speech, no matter how crazy much of what they have to say sounds.

BTW--the term "Progressive" works, too. I consider both "Liberal" and "Progressive" to be a compliment :-).

[FeatherLover]

Originally Posted by Irish

#18. You have to believe in the right of even delusional right-wing wingnuts to indulge in Free Speech, no matter how crazy much of what they have to say sounds.

BTW--the term "Progressive" works, too. I consider both "Liberal" and "Progressive" to be a compliment :-).

Well said.

[birdyland]

Wow. Isn't this a can of worms? lol

I thought it was funny...

[JillLang]

That was good!

[Kevin]

I cut a couple ones off the joke ... as I though could be alittle dicey...