Obituary of an Old Friend

[LtlWngdAngl]

Obituary of an old friend



Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Mr. Common Sense.

Mr. Sense had been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old

he was since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such value lessons as knowing

when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm and that

life isn't always fair.



Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend

more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not

kids, are in charge). His health began to rapidly deteriorate when

well intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place -

reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for

kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash

after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student,

only worsened his condition.



Mr. Sense declined even further when schools were required to get

parental consent to administer aspirin to a student; but, could not

inform the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have

an abortion.



Finally, Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments

became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received

better treatment than their victims.



Common Sense finally gave up the ghost after a woman failed to

realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot, she spilled a bit in

her lap, and was awarded a huge settlement.



Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust,

his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son,

Reason. He is survived by two stepbrothers; My Rights and Ima Whiner.

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.

[Tiki]

Sadly enough, that is too true, Nina. Let me know where to send the flowers!