Stupid News For This Week - Funny / You can't be serious!

[Kevin]

Note to self, don't leave a gun within reach of a woman lol....

POTTER VALLEY, Calif. — A Mendocino County woman who was trying to kill mice in her trailer with a gun ended up shooting herself and another person.

The 43-year-old woman pulled out her .44-caliber Magnum revolver after she saw the mice scurrying across the floor of her trailer on Highway 20 in Potter Valley, sheriff's officials said.

But she accidentally dropped the gun, which went off as it struck the floor. The bullet went through the woman's kneecap, bounced off the keys sitting on the belt loop of a 42-year-old man in the trailer and grazed the man's groin before ending up in his coin pocket.

Authorities did not release the shooting victims' names.

The mice escaped the shooting unharmed.

[Kevin]

McDonald’s is openly supporting the Chinese against the Americans at the Olympics

China - The Olympics are supposed to be about the spirit of competition among nations although we all know the games are about making money. With that in mind, McDonald’s is seizing the opportunity to promote its brand - even if it’s at the expense of America. Ronald, Grimace, the Hamburglar, and the other characters at McDonald’s have chosen the slogan “Wo jiu xihuan Zhongguo ying,” for their Chinese marketing campaign. When translated the phrase means “I love it when China wins.”

[Kevin]

Dog thrown off overpass survives with just a fat lip

NIAGARA FALLS, Ont. – Deborah Pepin had no idea what the dark object was that fell from an overpass – until it yelped.

"It happened so fast that I didn't compute what it was, and then I heard this god-awful wailing," the Mississauga woman said yesterday.

Then she realized it was a dog.

From her driver's seat, Pepin glanced up at the overpass and saw a human arm reaching over. "You can't print what I want to say about that person. I'd like to get my hands on whoever did this," she said.

It happened early Tuesday as Pepin and her husband, Ed, were returning from a day trip in the U.S.

After impact, the dog got up and began to limp down the road, with the Pepins following slowly behind until it collapsed.

The German shepherd mix, about 2 years old, was taken to a vet, who found it suffered only just a fat lip, pierced by an incisor tooth.

The Canadian Press

[Kevin]

A freakish shower of hailstones the size of ping pong balls caused damage to 30,000 new, pre-delivery Volkswagen Golfs, Passats, Polos, Eos, Jettas and Tiguans at a German port.

The worldwide automotive industry arguably has a lot to answer for with regards the part it plays in climate change, however Mother Nature has chosen to vent her considerable spleen on a collection of seemingly inoffensive Volkswagens in Germany.

30,000 Vee-Dubs were quietly waiting in line to be shipped overseas from a dockside plant in Emden on Germany’s northern seaboard when the hailstorm struck.

Hail the size of ping pong balls rained down on the new Volkswagens in a freak storm that’s caused damage worth hundreds of millions of dollars. For the most part, vehicles sustained heavy paint and bodywork damage, yet amazingly little glass was shattered during the climatical strop.

The German car manufacturer has assured customers across Europe waiting on delivery of their new Volkswagens that they’ll leave no hailstone unturned in their quest to uncover any unseen damage, however invisible to the naked eye.

Fortunately, the far-sighted auto builders carry the type of gargantuan insurance policy that covers such acts of God.

[Kevin]

No kitty, no die: Marley the cat survives 14-storey plunge
Susan Lazaruk , Canwest News Service
Published: Thursday, July 03, 2008

VANCOUVER - Marley the cat dropped 14 storeys out of a window of a high-rise and lived to meow about it.

It may have been nature that lured him out, and it was nature that cushioned his fall.

Angela Bester had left a window slightly ajar for her one-year-old Scottish Fold domestic cross she named after a favourite singer, Bob Marley, while she took an overnight trip to Whistler.


When she returned to her 14th storey condo, she froze.

"I saw the window and I knew instantly what had happened and I looked at the (uneaten) food and the water. In my heart, I knew he was gone," said the construction health and safety manager.

"I was completely devastated."

Fearing what lay below, her boyfriend, Jonathan Stevens, volunteered to go down to the ground-floor garden that doubles as a green roof for the parking lot.

He saw a flattened fern. Then he spotted Marley darting into the shrubbery.

Bester and their neighbours joined the search and after three hours, Marley finally emerged, still looking dazed and confused.

"He was hugging my boyfriend, he had his paws around his neck and he was not letting go," said Bester.

A trip to the vet gave him the all-clear.

"He's extremely affectionate like he's always been," said Bester.

She guessed Marley took the dive after being tempted by the birds that frequently fly nearby, and she plans to install a screen over the window.

"We figured it out, he fell 150 feet," said Bester.

The high perch may have saved him. Studies have shown 90 per cent of cats that have fallen up to 32 storeys have survived. Ironically, those falling from higher than six storeys are more likely to survive - and they suffer fewer injuries.

The theory is when cats reach full velocity, they relax and spread themselves out like a flying squirrel and land on their bellies, not their feet.

Another possible explanation is that cats that die in a fall from great heights are less likely to be brought to the vet.

Marley's free fall isn't even the local record.

Two cats survived a fall from a 21-storey apartment into bushes in August 1997, and a 10-month-old kitten lived after a 20-storey plummet from a Burnaby, B.C., building in July 1994.

[Kevin]

HELL ON WHEELS
BROOKLYN VAN WAS WIRED FOR CARNAGE
By LARRY CELONA and JOHN DOYLE
EVIL PLOT: Police believe a van loaded with guns and homemadeexplosives (above) was rigged by Yang Tung, currently in a Connecticut jail for a similar plot.
EVIL PLOT: Police believe a van loaded with guns and homemadeexplosives (above) was rigged by Yang Tung, currently in a Connecticut jail for a similar plot.
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Posted: 3:10 am
July 5, 2008

A bomb-laden van found on a Brooklyn street by a car thief was wired to detonate by remote control, and had likely been sitting there for more than five months, sources said yesterday.

Investigators believe the homemade explosives found Thursday night in the Ford Econoline belonged to Yung Tang, 39, a Chinese national. He has been behind bars since he was caught Jan. 29 in Wallingford, Conn., with nearly identical bombs in his Mazda MPV minivan.

"Based on the manner in which the materials inside the van were constructed, it's possibly linked to an individual in custody in Connecticut," said one source.

Also found in the MPV were two silencers, four hollow-point bullets and two radio-controlled detonators.

Days after that arrest, the NYPD searched his Brooklyn house and found yet anther van - a Ford Explorer - full of similar explosive devices.

In May, Brooklyn prosecutors charged Tang with attempted murder for allegedly planting a bomb near the car of a commercial tenant he was trying to evict.

The victim lost his foot in the 2002 blast.

Sources said the homemade bombs inside the Econoline - made of Styrofoam cups, 10-ounce water bottles, cans of WD-40 and five-gallon jugs filled with gasoline - were rigged to go off via a remote car-door opener.

A thief who broke into the vehicle as it was parked on 53rd Street near Second Avenue saw the explosives, then drove the van from the mostly residential block to a remote location near the waterfront.

The thief, who has an arrest record, then phoned a cop he knew from a previous run-in with the law.

The 53rd Street location is six blocks from the home of Tang's estranged wife, whom he has threatened to kill, according to federal prosecutors.

Neighbors of Tang's wife said she had sold the house last week.

"I'm scared," said one resident. "I'm scared he's going to come back."

In papers filed in the Connecticut case, prosecutors said Tang's wife has complained of physical abuse and threats - including one to hurl her out the window of a cruise ship while they were on vacation.

Tang's lawyer, George Farkas, denied that there was a connection between his client and the van.

"My guy has been in jail," said Farkas. "What that means, I don't know. It makes an interesting news story, but I think he has the alibi of alibis."

The car thief was not expected to be charged.

[Kevin]

Excuses, Excuses: Trying to Get Out of Traffic Tickets

Here's the craziest excuses Kitsap County cops have actually received (that's worth repeating — these are real) when they ask the motorist: "Why were you speeding?"

"I didn't know I was, because my lights are off."

"I'm taking my friend to the hospital. He has alcohol poisoning." (The driver was drunk, too).

After crashing: "I put supreme gas in the car, which caused me to lose control." (He, too, was found to be drunk.)

"Don't I get a couple over when I am taking my grandkids to the airport?"

"I get 10 extra in the fast lane."

"My speedometer is broken."

"Gas pedal got stuck."

"I'm trying to catch that UFO. Can you try to catch it for me?"

"I had a bee in the car."

"I am late for church and don't want to go to hell."

"I have been drinking and want to get off the road quickly."

"I'm going to a divorce proceeding and if you met her, sir, you would understand why I am hurrying."

"I am wearing really heavy shoes today and they make the gas pedal go down more."

"I just got my license back from it being suspended and I am not used to driving."

"My doctor gave me the wrong meds."

[Kevin]

Pagan symbols can stay if permit bought

A decision that allows hand-painted religious symbols on a Des Moines couple's privacy fence has opened a debate at City Hall over the definition of graffiti.

Inspectors in May ordered Ryle and Rachel MacPebbles to remove pagan and Celtic symbols from the fence after a neighbor complained. The couple appealed on religious freedom grounds, and city officials this week decided the handiwork can stay if the couple buys a $35 sign permit.
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"I guess our definition of graffiti is changing," said Ben Bishop, the city's neighborhood inspections administrator. "The MacPebbleses claim this is their free expression, and it certainly is their free expression. I have no problem with that. In my department, we were of the opinion it was graffiti."

Deputy City Attorney Mark Godwin said city officials withdrew the graffiti complaint because the fence falls under a city law that governs signs, since the symbols were painted by the property owner, not vandals.

Graffiti is judged "on a case-by-case basis, like we always do," he said. "We don't prejudge anything."

SuAnn Donovan, the city's deputy zoning enforcement officer, said that the MacPebbles' symbols represent "personal expression," but that officials must still decide whether the fence complies with the size limit - 6 square feet - for signs in residential neighborhoods.

"We have to be careful, and we have to decide what the ordinance allows us to do," she said. "I don't believe that anybody has had to look at it this way before."

Bishop's office regulates graffiti. Some street gangs use quasi-religious symbols to mark territory.

Godwin said the MacPebbles decision would not automatically apply to gangs.

"We'd have to handle that on a case-by-case basis," he said. "Maybe we'd have to go to court to test the religious beliefs of the gang people writing the stuff."

Sgt. Vince Valdez said a change in the way graffiti is defined will not affect how the department investigates complaints.

"Whenever we look at graffiti, we look at it from a vandalism standpoint," he said. "We're not analyzing the religious content."

The situation, while unusual, played out in similar fashion earlier this year in Auckland, New Zealand, where neighbors were outraged when a man painted a large white symbol that resembled a swastika on the roof of his house. The man said it was a Hindu sign meant to protect his family and home. City officials said they did not have authority to regulate it, but the man later modified the sign to appease neighbors.

MacPebbles, who lives at 2023 S.E. Sixth St., promised to get a sign permit to keep his fence in compliance with the city.

He said the symbols - a bull that represents food blessings; letters of ancient Germanic alphabet that mean good health, protection and larger perspective; a pentagram; and other Celtic symbols - are meant to protect the home and to ward off evil.

"People won't leave us alone because they don't understand us," he said. "We're not devil worshippers. We believe in peace. ... I don't want to make an enemy of the city, I just want my equal rights."

The neighbor who complained has declined to comment publicly. Meanwhile, Kathryn Morgan, who lives east of MacPebbles, said she has no problem with the symbolism.

The decision sets a precedent for how the city deals with complaints, especially those that deal with religious symbols, said Bishop, who apologized to the MacPebbleses in a letter for "any inconvenience this matter may have caused."

"I think, generally speaking, once we confirm it's put on by the property owner, we generally will not take a stand on it," he said. "But I don't want to limit myself to say that whatever people put on their property we won't take action."

[Kevin]

Angry passenger uses emergency slide to leave jetliner in Guyana

2 days ago

GEORGETOWN, Guyana — Guyanese authorities say a first-class airline passenger was so angry at seeing economy passengers leave a jetliner before him that he yanked open an emergency hatch and slid down the chute.

Police spokesman Sealall Persaud says the Guyanese man identified as Satyanand Christopher appeared to be intoxicated after the Delta Airlines flight from New York.

Persaud says local police arrested Christoper, who was quickly released on bail after the Friday incident.

Delta spokesman Junior Horatio says the U.S. carrier plans to file charges against the man for interfering with flight crew members.

[Kevin]

A new law has been passed by the Iranian parliament extending use of the death penalty to online crimes. Previously, only people charged with insulting Islam or drug trafficking had been sentenced to death.
Iranian President Mahmoud...

Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad.
Photo: AP
Slideshow: Pictures of the week

In accordance with the new law, bloggers and website editors can be sentenced to death for crimes such as promoting corruption, prostitution and apostasy, the International Freedom of Expression Exchange (IFEX) reported.

Blogging about subjects such as minority rights and freedom of speech and religion has already carried a risk. In 2005, blogger Mojtaba Saminejad was tried before a local court in Teheran charged with insulting the prophets, which carries the death penalty. He was eventually acquitted. Last year, two Kurdish bloggers were sentenced to death on charges of subversive activities against national security, spying and separatist propaganda.

Blogging is very popular in Iran - even the president, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, has his own blog and the Persian language is one of the most commonly used on the Internet






A new law has been passed by the Iranian parliament extending use of the death penalty to online crimes. Previously, only people charged with insulting Islam or drug trafficking had been sentenced to death.
Iranian President Mahmoud...

Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad.
Photo: AP
Slideshow: Pictures of the week

In accordance with the new law, bloggers and website editors can be sentenced to death for crimes such as promoting corruption, prostitution and apostasy, the International Freedom of Expression Exchange (IFEX) reported.

Blogging about subjects such as minority rights and freedom of speech and religion has already carried a risk. In 2005, blogger Mojtaba Saminejad was tried before a local court in Teheran charged with insulting the prophets, which carries the death penalty. He was eventually acquitted. Last year, two Kurdish bloggers were sentenced to death on charges of subversive activities against national security, spying and separatist propaganda.

Blogging is very popular in Iran - even the president, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, has his own blog and the Persian language is one of the most commonly used on the Internet.
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The municipality of Teheran has now decided to follow the international trend of micro blogging and decided that every neighborhood in Teheran will have its own blog, the Iranian site Hamshahri Online reported.